Thanks For All The Chain Letters

Greetings! - A special thank you for all the hoax's you warned me about!

To all my friends, thanks for sending me all of your chain letters in 2003-2004: I read them, took them as facts, and obeyed them. Following is how I now live my life ... : )

* I stopped drinking Coca-Cola after I found out that it's good for removing toilet stains.

* I stopped going to the movies for fear of sitting on a needle infected with AIDS.

* I smell like a dog since I stopped using deodorants because they cause cancer.

* I don't leave my car in the parking lot or any other place and sometimes I even have to walk about 7 blocks for fear that someone will drug me with a perfume sample and try to rob me.

* I also stopped answering the phone for fear that they ask me to dial a stupid number and then I get a phone bill from the devil with calls to Uganda, Singapore and Tokyo.

* I stopped consuming several foods for fear that the estrogens they contain may turn me gay.

* I also stopped eating chicken and hamburgers because they are nothing other than horrible mutant freaks with no eyes or feathers that are bred in a lab so that places like McDonalds can sell their Big Macs.

* I also stopped drinking anything out of a can for fear that I will get sick from the rat faeces and urine.

* I also donated all my savings to the Amy Bruce account. A sick girl that was about to die in the hospital about 7,000 times. Funny thing about that girl, she's been 7 since 1993 ...

* I went bankrupt from bounced checks that I made expecting the $15,000 that Microsoft and AOL were supposed to send me when I participated in their special e-mail program.

* My Ericcson phone never arrived and neither did the passes for a paid vacation to Disneyland.

* I never received any of the wishes I made, and I sent 10 copies of he chain letter.

* I am still looking at my screen for things to pop up after sending out the message to my friends

* I am positive that all this is the cause of a stinking chain that I broke or forgot to follow and thus I got an e-mail curse.

IMPORTANT NOTE: Send this e-mail to at least 1200 people in the next 10 seconds or the bird of paradise will poop on you today at 7pm.